Soft moonlight
by Luthi585
Summary: Maybe life isn't perfect... but why stop now?... A thoughtful one shot... Mitsuki thinks about life and the reason to live [A little manga spoilerish] [Mitsuki centered]


**Soft Moonlight**

**Raiting: **K+

Hi! First of all… This is my first FMwS Fan fic, so don't be so cruel xD, I'm just starting getting accustomed to the story and everything… One important things, is that this is based in the manga, 'cause I've never watched the anime… is it different? Well... I hope is not that much xD, This story has some spoilers, so... watch out! XP

Apart from that… well. I hope you like it XP

It's a bit Mitsuki centered 'cause it doesn't have that much of storyline, just... some thoughts, and memories…

Anyway, hope you like it XP

Don't forget to review! XP

**Disclamer:** I don't own any of the characters, nor any of… well, anything from FMwS.

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**Mitsuki's POV**

_Sometimes it is difficult trying to find a way to forget._

It may not seem like it, but at my actual age, I've gone through situations that no other my age would worry about. At my 12 years I've learned one of the things that most people, even grown ups, try to avoid at all costs… _death_

I've just learned that my dream of becoming a singer may never come true. You see, I have an illness, and one that is not to be taken lightly. A tumor, in my throat. If I ever get to sing, my life will stand on the edge.

But it's been a while since I don't care about this. It's been a while since I've wanted my life to end as quickly as possible. At least… that was before… before this.

You know, when I was a little girl and after I found out that my parents had died, I was taken to this house, where other children lived. At first, I didn't know anything, but some years after, I found out that this house was destined to children without parents, better call it, an orphanage.

The day that I arrived I met a boy, which at the time, was just a stranger. But time changes all things, and as my feelings for him at first were just of indifference, slowly they turned into care, then to friendship, and at last, when it was too late, and he wasn't by my side anymore, I realized that I felt love for him.

"_Eichi-kun, Eichi-kun, Eichi-kun"_

Sometimes, people teases me by reminding me of how many times I say his name, but one thing that they don't understand is that my memories of him will never go away… neither will his name fade from my lips.

I can still hear his voice calling my name. I can still hear his voice pronouncing those 3 words that at first were so shocking, but after thought, were so important…

"_I love you"…_

I t was too late when I realized that I shared the same feelings. It was too late when I decided to tell him I felt the same way. Before I knew it, his spirit had darted away from this Earth, and his body was left behind, unusable.

…

It is incredible how we, human beings, just hear what we want to hear. The moment I learned that he died… is just a blur in my memory. It's as though my mind was a sheet of paper and someone had wet it, leaving the writing almost unreadable.

Even as years passed, I could still feel his presence, I could still see his eyes when I closed mine. It was as though my mind kept screaming at me that he was dead, and he was never coming back. But my heart came crushing my mind and kept telling me to have hope and to believe that he was alive.

But how can I keep up hope if my life has reduced to living each day to hear how bad my throat is?

How can I keep up hope that he is alive when I, myself, am dying?

How can I still smile when I know that maybe, _just maybe_, he can't do it anymore?

Maybe I'm just selfish; maybe I'm just looking for a reason to live. Maybe I'm using him as a reason to keep fighting.

But… is that bad?

I don't think it is.

Maybe he was helping me more than anyone that's around me. Sometimes is good having someone to rely on, someone to trust. Even if I know that in the end I'll hurt me ore knowing that I tried so hard to get to hear simple words from him… as "Good job" or "Keep it up"… That I tried so hard to hear him say those words… and in the end, he'll never say them… because he can't…

Maybe we all do have a destiny. Maybe I was destined to have my dreams crushed, to loose the love of my life, and loose my parents. Maybe it's all meant to make me stronger. To me make me someone.

I want to believe that. I want to believe that all it's just destined for me to mature, because I know that if I don't fake my smiles sometimes… then I'll never get the will to be happy, I'll never get the will to smile truly.

Then, why fall down and stay there?

Why deny seeing the bright side?

Some people may call me crazy, or may say that I am too insensitive, because I even smile when bad things happen. But…

Shouldn't you be the crazy one?

Shouldn't you be the one that get points at?

**Why should you cry and lay there when life _won't stop outside_?**

Call me crazy if you want, point your finger at me, or talk behind my back. That won't stop _me_ from being _me_. That won't stop me from going on and be happy until the last day… until my last breath.

_Sometimes it is difficult trying to find a way to forget. The human brain will never forget, it all stays there. But I'm sure that the heart can forget and forgive... That's why I'll keep trying… 'til my last day._

**The End.**

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Heeey! Review! Hahaha 

I totally loved the last 8 paragrahps XP

I feel really connected to them, as though I wrote them from my heart…

Anyway, I hope you have liked it, so please

REVIEW!

**.·º ŁŭŧħĩзИ Êlяĩς º·.**


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